Scoutie Girl has sent out a call for crafters to share their struggles. She declares that “We are not always happy people covered with tacky glue, acrylic paint and threads of a newly sewn dress.” So true, so true.
My art professor, Sue Buck, said to us once, “When the pain of NOT creating art exceeds the pain of creating art, that’s when you’ll start working again.” This happens less for me now in the world of craft than in the world of fine art. I can exist with the creative process more playfully, pulling out materials and just using my eyes and feelings to put them together and create rhythm, contrasting and harmonizing colors, sizes and textures until I find something that I didn’t know I was looking for.
Sounds idyllic, doesn’t it? Well, much of the day is filled with little struggles believe it or not. Most of these come from a place of self-doubt and second guessing. Am I marketing enough? Am I marketing effectively? Should I do a craft show? Should I feel bad if I decide not to do a craft show? Are the pictures good enough? Are the tags appropriate enough? Am I charging enough? Am I charging too much? On and on my thoughts sometimes pull me, a murmuring undercurrent to all my activities. Sometimes I’ll even reach a point where I think to myself “What is the point of anything, anyway?”
What then brings me out of this cloud of self-doubt is an immersion in creation, an immersion in craft and in art. When I’m playing with colorful semiprecious stones or slathering thick, plum-colored oil paint on a canvas, I become immersed in beauty, in possibility and freedom. The baggage of everyday gets set outside the door of my mental room and I’m simply existing and playing. Like during meditation or yoga practice, the questioning voice inside my head stills and I’m gliding. After a while, the voice comes back, the worries rear their ominous heads, but it’s always a cycle, a return to peace is guaranteed. Without the struggle, there would be no sublime moments of creation and vice versa, they exist in tandem.
In conclusion, I think that Sue’s statement still applies in a larger-picture sense: “When the pain of NOT creating a business exceeds the pain of creating a business, that’s when you’ll start working again.” Maybe even more accurately, “When the pain of NOT living exceeds the pain of living…” or “When the pain of NOT dragging yourself off of the couch exceeds the pain of dragging yourself off of the couch…” Quiet, depressed, unsure-of-yourself times come to us all, but they will also leave us again eventually. Life is a bumpy ride, but I think we’d better enjoy every pothole, because this whole experience is all-too precious and temporary.
Have stories of craft/art struggles to share? Please do! Also, check out ScoutieGirl’s blog post about her experiences with depression and to see other people’s struggles they have shared there.
Sasa says
Hi Jenny, thanks for featuring my Yin Yang print!! You have a great blog and super cool jewerly. ☮ Sasa
Ash says
Hi. Thanks very much for your response to the question. In a major coincidence type thing, today, my own daily struggle got a little bit too much, and I've ended up being re-referred to the psychiatrist by my GP.
I found this response uplifting and helpful, and will continue to drag myself out of bed, because being in it is too boring.
Jenny says
Aw, thanks Sasa! You have supercool rocks!! (Geo minor speaking here!)
Hello Ash, nice to meet you 🙂 I'm so glad you found this uplifting! It's so fulfilling to have expressions of my life energy be meaningful and useful to others…I hope you keep dragging yourself out of bed, 'cause you're right, there's only so many times you can make up stories with the shadows the plant is making on the wall (No matter how warm and cozy those covers are!) and because you seem like a super person. 🙂 Heck, you commented on my blog, I bet you're an awesome person!!
Tamz says
Dear Jenny,
Here's a TEDtalk (and if you don't know about TEDtalks already…JUST YOU WAIT) that keeps me going as an artist:
http://www.ted.com/talks/elizabeth_gilbert_on_genius.html
And an interview with my current crush that got my ass moving recently:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQg1IMjPZpA
Of course, Sue's words echo in my head every day. I love what that woman gave me.
Have you read Art and Fear? Your mom owns it. It's quite nice. I don't know if this is a coherent comment but I'll wrap up with this:
I fear every day that I'm not really an artist. And some days, I make some art. And some other days, I remember that's what actually makes me an artist in the first place.
Love you, Jenny!
Jenny says
Loved that talk by Elizabeth Gilbert, Tammy! It's so true, because when the art is really good, I look at it and can't imagine where it came from…no memory of making it almost. (haven't checked out the interview yet, but I will)
I do have art and fear, I think we had to read it for Jr. Seminar? (I hated that class, but that's a diff't story) I'll have to look through it again, the last time I read it was when I got out here and was lost.
Love you too Tamz! 🙂